When the Balls Come Tumbling Down….

You know the analogy of life being like a juggler……You start out with easily floating 2 balls through the air from hand to hand. You add a 3rd ball and things get a bit more complicated, but still have a semblance of  order (if you are a decent juggler that is). Then come balls 4, 5 and maybe even 6.  You have to throw the balls higher and farther from your body in order to maintain the constant motion trying to keep all the balls in the air.  One false move and they all come tumbling down.  Some jugglers can handle only 2 balls, some can do some many it makes you dizzy just to watch.   Let’s put it this way……..For the record, I’m not a good juggler.

I’ve learned over the past few months that when life becomes a juggle, I have to reevaluate which balls are the most important to keep up in the air.  For three years I’ve worked as the fitness director at a local community center.  This was a great job.  I supervised wonderful staff and made connections through the Southern Utah community.  The job provided me with flexibility to work when I could and especially to work around the ever-changing needs of my little family.

I liked my job.  I loved what I did, but the juggle of day-to-day life began to take its toll.  I was getting up are the crack of dawn, or well before, to get my workouts for the day done.  I would piggy-back my training with responsibilities at “the office”.  My husband, who manages two businesses from home, would bring the kids to me so they could go to daycare or another activity at the Community Center.  When I ran out of daycare hours, I would head home to sit the kiddos down to lunch and in front of the t.v. so I could get more work done.

My husband would walk in. I would walk out.  I felt like the house was in shambles and I was barely making ends meet at work.  I didn’t love my job.  The kids were spending more time than I ever intended in daycare or in front of the t.v. (one in the same on most days).  I was getting my workouts in, but only in the lonely, dark hours of the morning.  There had to be something better than this.  When my husband and I looked at the bottom line, it wasn’t really getting us anywhere.  Between time, commuting and just the stress of the situation, the costs were far outweighing the benefits.  Something had to give as all the balls I was juggling were beginning to tumble all around me.

So I quit……..

I’ve never been a quitter in my entire life.  I’ve never just given up on something.  But in this situation, I had to do it.  I sat down with my supervisor and officially gave my two weeks notice.  As I walked out of that meeting, I knew I had made the right decision.  My husband knew I had made the right decision.  I wasn’t just quitting…….I was refocusing and starting over.  I wasn’t going to drop all the balls I was juggling, just the few that were causing the most stress.  In two weeks, I would be free from the anxiety of my day-to-day “office” responsibilities.  I could focus.  I could juggle the balls that needed to stay in the air.

So here I sit………Unemployed.  I can say that I do miss some things about my job, but yet, I feel like my energy for life is renewed.  I can sleep in a little later.  Train a little harder.   Love my kids and husband a bit longer.  Change is a weird thing.  It’s never been something I’ve been afraid or even avoided. I just never want to be seen as someone who runs from a challenge.  In this situation, I’m not running.  I’m changing for the better and making the most out of the moments that I have been given.

Let’s all drop the balls for a moment………Pick up the ones that really deserve your energy and let the rest fall where they may.


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